I Hope West Ham Go Down and I'm Not Even Sorry
Look, I know it sounds harsh. I know they've got history, proper fans, all that. But honestly? After watching them stumble through this season like a drunk uncle at a wedding, I'm past caring. West Ham going down would be the best thing for my FPL sanity and probably for football in general.
They're not even interestingly bad. They're just... there. Taking up a Premier League spot while offering absolutely nothing. No attacking threat you can exploit, no defensive fragility you can target with captaincy picks, just this grey sludge of mediocrity that wastes your time every single gameweek. I've burned two transfers on their players this season (Bowen twice, Paquetá once because I'm an idiot) and got a combined 11 points for my trouble.
Meanwhile you've got teams like Brighton sitting on 61 momentum, Everton somehow at 58, even Wolves looking more coherent at 57. These teams are actually doing something. West Ham? They're the FPL equivalent of a player who gets subbed at 59 minutes. Just enough involvement to disappoint you, not enough to justify the investment.
And don't even get me started on their fixtures. Every time I think "right, they've got a good run coming up, maybe Bowen's worth a punt" they go and lose to someone they should beat or draw 0-0 in a match with 0.3 combined xG. It's exhausting.
Relegate them. Bring up a Championship side with actual hope and energy. At least then I'd know to avoid them instead of falling for the same trap every season.
(Check fpltouchline.com if you want actual data on who to target instead of these clowns)